Cathescape

All things said and done

2009-10-26T00:34:00.000-07:00

Well...It's been some time not to actually put my thoughts on this blog, I have been quite busy with some field service. My skin has grown darker, and the weather is pretty extreme.

I am glad that I am finally alive. Alive - get back to my work, stepping into reality and dealing with real problems surely make me stronger than before, humans always learn, don't we? But in the end, we all take consequences of our actions. I regret some actions I did in the past, but I think moving forward is the best answer for me now.

I am back with my spiritual enlightenment, brother and sister are very kind to me, welcoming, that I think I have always found my home or more, a PARADISE.

Rest, teaching is something that I enjoy much. I hope I can become a better teacher and a better learner day by day. Thank God for all His kindness to me.

The unreachable

2009-10-08T23:08:00.000-07:00

So, yesterday he blocked me out of his life, he said he doesn't have any interest in anything I do. He simply doesn't care. Two weeks ago, he said he'll love me forever. However, that being said, I can see the hatred in the tone, that he said I damage his life, I am sad and reaching the conclusion,I know I shouldn't bother him in his life, because he told me the person I know is dead. For me, He is alive, and if he now chooses to be a new, cold him, then I'll keep the old him in my heart forever.

Love, it's something weird. I was in pain, and also in joy when being with him. But now, after all these, especially causing him such hatred, I know this time, I can let go.

Goodbye, my dear bf, u r always in my heart. :)I have promised the old him I will pray for him, I'll do. Wishing him happiness always.

Gossip!Warning alert! (An essay)

2009-09-30T11:16:00.000-07:00

It's not like I have never gossiped about people, but in this post, I won't be judging anyone, I am encouraging myself and anybody else to think before we all speak.

In Chinese it is shén-tán; in Finnish, juoru; in Italian, pettegolézzo; in Spanish, chisme. Yes, gossip is universal. In some languages, gossip may have an outright negative connotation. In English the word “gossip” basically means “idle talk,” chat about trivial matters.

Interestingly, though, the English term has acquired a negative connotation. “Gossip” is thus frequently preceded by the word “malicious” or “hurtful.” This is because idle talk so often amounts to hurtful or troublemaking talk. It may even turn into outright slander, which has been defined as “the utterance of false charges or misrepresentations which defame and damage another’s reputation.” Little wonder, then, that an ancient proverb says: “Gossip brings anger just as surely as the north wind brings rain.”—Proverbs 25:23

There is a rather basic reason for gossip: People are interested in people. Naturally, then, we are prone to talk about other people. As Max Gluckman, an anthropologist, once stated: “Every single day, and for a large part of each day, most of us are engaged in gossiping. I imagine that if we were to keep a record of how we use our waking-time, gossiping would come only after ‘work’—for some of us—in the score.”

When moderate and kind, casual talk may serve to exchange useful information, as a means of catching up on the latest goings-on. It may involve such innocent things as who got married, who is pregnant, and who died, or it may just be humorous talk that is free of malicious intent.

All too often, though, idle talk strays beyond the bounds of propriety and good taste. Facts are embellished, exaggerated, or distorted. Humiliation is made the source of humor. Privacy is violated. Confidences are betrayed. Reputations are injured or ruined. Things worthy of praise are obscured by complaining, murmuring, and faultfinding. That no harm was intended is of little solace to the one spoken about. Harmful gossip has thus been compared to mud thrown on a clean wall. It may not stick, but it always leaves a dirty mark.

Another reason we may easily be drawn into gossip is our natural desire to be liked and accepted by others. “For one reason or another,” wrote psychologists John Sabini and Maury Silver, “you have an obligation to talk; and gossip is a pleasant, easy, and universally accepted way to fulfill the obligation.” (Moralities of Everyday Life) To an extent, then, gossip is useful conversational fuel, a means to fit in.

The problem is that people tend to get far more excited about negative information than about positive information. Some even seem to enjoy being shocked by the sensational and the outrageous. Gossip is thus a real attention getter—the more lurid or scandalous the juicy tidbit, the better. Rarely is there any concern for substantiating shocking allegations.

This kind of gossip appeals to yet another human foible—inordinate curiosity. We love secrets. We enjoy being in the know. As early as 1730, when Benjamin Franklin began writing a gossip column for the Pennsylvania Gazette, it was discerned that people would pay for gossip.

Media gossip continues to survive—and thrive. In Europe newsstands virtually overflow with tabloids featuring stories about royal families, auto racers, and other international celebrities. One newspaper article thus called gossip big business.

But is it beneficial to be obsessively curious about what goes on in the privacy of people’s homes, bedrooms, and minds? Can the reading and viewing of material that tends to arouse prurient desires possibly be healthy? Obviously, media gossip takes curiosity beyond reasonable limits.

Unfounded rumors and misinformation have also provided fuel for harmful gossip. During the American Civil War, endless vinelike strands of telegraph lines were strung between military posts. The “grapevine” thus became a symbol of unconfirmed news, and the expression “I heard it through the grapevine” became a popular excuse for passing on unfounded rumors.

Unfortunately, the grapevine often yields bitter fruit. Rumors have been responsible for panic, death, and havoc. The cost to business alone has been incalculable. One fast-food restaurant chain spent more than a year combating a false rumor that its hamburgers contained worms. A company known for manufacturing soap products spent years—and millions of dollars—trying to squelch a rumor that its corporate symbol was the insignia of Satan and that the company itself was somehow involved in demon worship.

It is individuals, though, who suffer the greatest heartache and damage from rumors. Yet, because wild stories tend to be fascinating, people are inclined to promote them with little regard for the truth or for the consequences.

Envy and hate are often at the root of the most destructive form of gossip—malicious gossip, or slander.

THE young woman’s suicide shocked the quiet English town. Even more startling was the conclusion of the coroner’s jury: ‘She was killed by idle gossip!’ Evidently, the young woman’s name, her reputation, and ultimately her life were ruined by the town’s malicious idle talk.—Rumor and Gossip—The Social Psychology of Hearsay, by Ralph L. Rosnow and Gary Alan Fine.

Although the results are rarely that tragic, there is little question that gossip has awesome power. On the one hand, it may be credited as a common means of exchanging useful information. On the other hand, it may be held accountable for governmental turmoil, the splitting of families, the ruining of careers.

Gossip has been blamed for sleepless nights, heartache, and indigestion. And no doubt it has caused you some personal anguish at one time or another. In fact, writer William M. Jones warns that in the world of business, “you have to accept the possibility that in the course of your career somebody will try to get a knife between your shoulder blades.”

Negative gossip is almost universally frowned upon. Among the Seminole Indians of the United States, “talking bad about anyone” is put in the same category as lying and stealing. In one West African community, talebearers risked having their lips cut off or, even worse, they risked being executed! Indeed, throughout history, measures have been taken to curb gossip.

Between the 15th and 18th centuries, the so-called ducking stool was popularly used in England, in Germany, and, later, in the United States to try to shame gossipers into quitting their harmful chatter. One found guilty of the offense would be tied to a chair and repeatedly ducked in water.

While the ducking stool has long since gone the way of the pillory and stocks, a war against gossip has been carried on even in modern times. During the 1960’s, for example, so-called rumor-control centers were established in the United States to respond to rumors that were potentially harmful to government activities. Similar services have operated in Northern Ireland and in England. Laws have even been passed to curb gossip that is designed to cause economic damage to certain financial institutions.

Such efforts notwithstanding, gossip survives. It is alive and flourishing. Neither law nor any other human method has thus far succeeded in extinguishing its scorching power. Gossip is everywhere. There is neighborhood gossip, office gossip, shop gossip, party gossip, family gossip. It transcends all cultures, races, and civilizations, and it has flourished at every level of society. One expert said: “Gossip is so common it is almost like breathing.” He also said: ‘It is deeply a part of human nature.’

True, gossip often reveals a very dark side of human nature, a side that delights in tarnishing reputations, distorting the truth, and destroying lives. Yet, gossip is not inherently evil. There is a positive side to casual talk. And knowing where to draw the line between harmful and harmless gossip is the key to avoiding victimizing others—and being a victim yourself.

So how can you avoid stepping over the line of propriety and indulging in harmful gossip? How might you protect yourself from it?Let us look at just some of this advice

1. Bite Your Tongue: It has been said that “conversation is an exercise of the mind, but gossiping is merely an exercise of the tongue.” Really, most injurious speech reflects, not malice, but a failure to think before speaking. Some blab the business of others; they spice, exaggerate, and distort with little thought to the consequences. They expose to others the faults of their friends, mates, and children without even discerning the damage they inflict.

2. Do Not Listen to Hurtful Gossip.What would happen to ‘big mouths,’ if there were no ‘big ears’? Those who are constantly engaged in foolish talk are only part of the problem; those who take delight in paying attention are also accountable. Simply listening may constitute your silent approval and contribute to the spread of hurtful gossip. So when talk about someone gets out of hand, you may have to show some courage and say, ‘Let’s change the subject.’

3. Do Not Overreact to Gossip: Most people enjoy gossip as long as the gossip is not about them. On the other hand, suppose you are the victim of an ugly rumor or false story. Sometimes it is possible to track down the source of the story and calmly straighten matters out. But what if you cannot?

Your getting angry accomplishes nothing.Gossip is a fact of life, and at one time or another, you have probably been an active participant in it yourself. Is the matter really worth getting upset over? Will it most likely fade away after a while? There is “a time to laugh,” and perhaps showing that you have a sense of humor, laughing it off would be the best way to extinguish the rumor.

4. Do Not Add Fuel to the Fire: If the story simply refuses to die, ask yourself: ‘Could it be that I am giving others a reason to gossip? Am I perhaps behaving in a questionable manner, giving the appearance of wrongdoing?’ Consider the following situations:

□ A woman’s coworkers call her lazy and undependable behind her back—even though she carries out her duties satisfactorily. Why the bad reputation? For one thing, she manifests a carefree, easygoing attitude that is easily misinterpreted as laziness. Her grooming is far too casual for the business setting she works in. Finally, she is indiscreet in her handling of personal phone calls, talking loud enough to attract the attention of the whole office staff. Hence, the gossip!

□ A local storekeeper is the talk of his small community. Rumor has it that he has been unfaithful to his wife. The man vehemently denies the false allegation. The cause of the rumor? His reputation for being unduly familiar with female customers.

□ A teenage girl is spoken of as having loose morals. Some claim that she has several lovers and that she is a cocaine user. All the stories are false. But she is known for associating with individuals who are part of the drug scene. She is extreme in her dress, hairstyle, and makeup.

Gossip is here to stay. However, it must be respected for its potentially destructive power. You can avoid much heartache and grief for yourself and others simply by following these wise words: "Mind your own business!"

Just another chit chat after holiday

2009-09-24T06:02:00.000-07:00

Here I am again, sitting down, watching Ugly Betty. Well, I should give two thumbs up for this American TV series, really teaching us that inner beauty, intelligence do make their ways more than the outward appearance.
So, thanks to Hermawan, I am passing my holidays by watching Ugly Betty especially in times when I have some problems with my head, my stomach. Hehe
Well, now I am watching the second season of Ugly Betty, it does help improve my English watching Ugly Betty. Oh I love the English of Betty, Amanda and Christina. Wow. Beth is crazy about Christina, due to her Scottish accent...But I think Betty is nicer. Well, Beth's English is similar to Christina's, but what do I have? CHINESE English, so they say, huahahaha ^O^ phaise lo...

Muhje Tumse Pyaar He

2009-09-13T22:00:00.000-07:00

“Do I have a choice…when I am so helplessly in love with you…” He said this early morning today at 1 am.
That was when my heart sank, embracing him so tightly, we both never can separate, we are so in love to each other…
This is how my boyfriend and I got back again. My Indian boyfriend, my beloved one… Muhje Tumse Pyaar He!

Base Line

2009-08-20T00:46:00.000-07:00

This morning, I woke up, thinking of something big to happen, something enjoyable. Well, I believe everyone expects something good happens to him all the time, n especially me at the moment. Each day seems a frenzy of manic activity, a marathon of hurdles like coping with excessive paperwork, my study and my daily work. Pheewh! I dun remember when the last time I got my recreation. Looking back to my past, I used to hang out with my friends very often, almost everyday. But if somebody asks me if I want to go back to those days, high possibly I will say "No". Why? I'm not really sure. Hanging out isn't the answer, I guess. Granted, my past has a lot of memories - mostly sweet, but it's not something that I am contented with.

I always question myself: Is human supposed to be satisfied? Or else? Is it true that we mustn't "stop till we reach the top"? And who is going to set the parameter of what 'top' actually is. Is it myself? Then, why am I never satisfied even though I have reached the top?

A friend of mine ever shared to me about what he called as 'base line'. Every human being has the base line, that it is simply the base of what we want. A person sets a goal, then after he has reached the goal, he is undeniably going back to the 'base line'. He merely thinks or feel normal about that, he might be excited for a while, but won't be long cos he's not satisfied and will ask for more.U get what I mean? Humans are never satisfied if they don't maintain the perspective of their own base lines.

An actor, once liked fooling around with girls, having sex and abusing drugs, eventually found out that he's suffering from HIV infection. Starting that point, he was seeing everything in different perspective, realising that he's gonna pass away soon. Every single minute seemed very precious to him. He appreciated people more than ever. Every single moment was enjoyable, like a blessing. Do u think why it is so? Simply because the perspective in the base line has changed. People like him are satisfied, or I should say 'close to satisfaction', cos they know how to maintain the balance of what they should get or they shouldn't get.

How to be happy? There are varieties of of answers for this. It doesn't matter. But when a person is satisfied with what he wants, what he gets, his family, his environment, his society, he is probably the happiest person alive. To be satisfied, base line should be set with certain realistic perspective.

Can I do that? Not really sure, but am trying hard for that. I Am trying to see everything from 'base line', be satisfied with my work, my life generally.

A dream saga (A collaborative ballad)

2009-08-18T23:02:00.000-07:00

First, thanks to Jonathan Marpaung who initiated this as a comment on my poem in facebook note, now,I would love to share in my blog how this ballad has become, it's very funny, romantic and interesting with efforts to make the lines rhyme, despite few inconsistencies...This poem can be found originally in my comments in my note on facebook titled 'Frozen', and anyone who feels like prolonging it can comment more on the notes,welcome, and please please do...I myself found it very fun as this is so unpredictable and abrupt... But, we can consider this ended, unless there are more lines later, then I will update.

Jonathan Marpaung at 10:26am March 25

Once upon a time
There was a knight
Who lived to make a dime
By conquest and by fight

Power overcame reason
Victory a constant lust
But soon will come the season
When all will return to dust

Catherine Tanoto at 12:02pm March 25

Cos love then came unknowingly and forcefully
Power conquest and fight are no longer that intense
A thing has overwhelmed his mind truly
A love has came to him in immense

A lady in one of his excurse
Frail, beautiful and unprotected
Whether or not he had himself in curse
His reasons were emotionally-tainted

Husain Daud Abidi at 1:52pm March 27

Then Came a night!
With thunderstorms and sky light!
When a Demon Came from underworld
ready to take over the earth

The knight knew what needed to be done
To let his kingdom shine by the Sun
Leaving his lady under the protection of god
he went to fight the demon in the weather red hot

Jonathan Marpaung at 3:44pm March 27

Onward to battle the undead!
With seven heads and seven tentacles
Whose roar filled men's heart with dread
And it's eyes a diabolical spectacle

Unleashed the fury of a beast
Chained for eons beneath the earth
The knight in armor not daunted the least
For he fought for the lady who filled his heart with mirth

Husain Daud Abidi at 8:04pm March 27

The Day was cursed the hearts were bent
A rumour sneaked Girl like a rodent
The knight had died She Came to know
And from her eyes oceans began to flow

Stood on the Demon's 3rd head Knight Slashed his Sword
Piercing it in its heart more can the Demon could afford
Taking a sommersault, Knight landed on the Ground
Demon bled to death,n Knight,in style,spun his sword around

Catherine Tanoto at 11:22pm March 27

Day by day the lady felt miserable
Tears came flowing and intolerable
She had thought of his man’s death morning and night
How would she lead her life without her knight?

She could not release this obsession
She would simply go out of this vexation
Tempted to join him in his new place
Trying to find some toxic so she wouldn’t face anymore days

Husain Daud Abidi at 2:09pm March 28

So she decided what needed to be done
she decided to end her life with a gun
She took the gun fixed it on her head
She glanced the window with her face wide spread

she shed her tears for the time last
Her mind was stunned and thoughts came fast
When suddenly she saw a bright light
blurring completely her eyesight

Catherine Tanoto at 2:22pm March 28

Her man was standing at the front door
Light came showed the only man she adore
Heavy agony turned bliss
Her longing and worry came into peace

Tears came and blurred her eyes
Trying to say, tell and shout
But all she knew her love was so big in size
Thank God,alive her knight she thought about

Husain Daud Abidi at 2:31pm March 28

But then it disappeared like a shadow
She fell down on the floor like a meadow
Was she going insane she thought
So she fixed the gun back on the spot

One of Knights Friends was passing by
Beneath the graceful starry sky
He was so smart and his name was Kevin
Startlingly he heard a gunshot from his friend's cabin

Catherine Tanoto at 2:47pm March 28

Kevin hurried and looked what happened
He could see the lady there
She was very emotionally dampened
Decided to die before it gave her more nightmare

But what made Kevin more surprised
Was his best friend hugging her lady on his lap
The lady had planned to die to pay her price
But the knight made her miss the shot by slap

Husain Daud Abidi at 2:59pm March 28

Kevin was still glancing the scene
when suddenly they heard a hard scream
Knight glanced out of window to outside
A Monster had came out of nowhere like a tide

Knight ordered kevin to escape with her lady
And he took out his sword like a real slim shady
As they cleared the house The Monster banged Fist
For the escape Knight gave his body a nice twist

Catherine Tanoto at 3:31pm March 28

The lady was so panicked
"Is this a trick?"
One thing she had in mind was just
Never ever leave her man in gust

So, she pulled herself out from Kevin
Chasing her man worrying and finding hint
Taking her own sword and trying to fight
Not waiting and crying out of her man's sight

Husain Daud Abidi at 3:52pm March 28

The Monster was Huge as Mountain
But they were pouring with Love Fountain
They Jumped together like flying darts
They knew one hell of Martial Arts

They Jumped long on the Monster's Head
They Didn't fear at all to be dead
Two swords flashed like a bolt
Giving the monster A Painful Jolt

Catherine Tanoto at 11:27pm March 28

The monster fell into pieces
Breaking into lots of smaller spheres
One of them grabbed the princess
and flew away into the darkest atmospheres

The knight shouted in fear
Knowing that his lady was missing was beyond the pale
All of a sudden, he felt queer
This is the first time he felt so frail...l

Husain Daud Abidi at 1:37am March 29

Then he clenched his teeth and fist
He gave his muscles a roring twist
he took out his sword from the sheath
And went to monsters lair beneath

Dark was the lair with webs of spider
and mysterious liquids flowing everywhere
But he was like his own world rider
His Legs were firm in that dark sphere

Catherine Tanoto at 2:07am March 29

Lady was hurt and got injured
There in the lair she was absorbed with poison
Tears went flowing and nightmares conjured
And dreams on her prince flew away far and worsened

All the whirls came and she forgot
just like a brainwashing she could not
remember a thing on her romance with her knight
In that darkest lair her love was put off in a night

Husain Daud Abidi at 3:31am March 29

Exploring the darkest corners was the knight
He expected a mighty fight
His sword was flashing with the light
N he sensed danger so held his breath tight

Suddenly without his notice
Ground slipped from his feet
And he fell in a trapdoor
too dark for light to reseat

Catherine Tanoto at 3:38am March 29

The lady woke up in the middle of that dungeon
She couldn't figure out what brought her here
Nothing, no one, no explanation was shown
She went out and left her place without fear

She heard a scream in gloom
She wondered and searched for that desperate emotion
She then found a room
and there she found a familiar charming man in question

Husain Daud Abidi at 10:38pm March 29

He looked at her eyes large and deep
Like there were a thousand promises to keep
She said nothing and nothing he said
But Silent tiny droplets of rain were overshed

He felt something that smelt more than vengeance
Her eyes seemed to question his own existence
He brought his lips closer to her and she was tainted
But he felt his head heavy and on the spot fainted

Catherine Tanoto at 11:43pm March 29

The knight fell down hard and sickened
Guess a strong knight could lose too
Not to any monsters but to his lady without his clue
He was too tired fighting and heart broken

The lady was so haggard
Her feeling was so stunned by him and complex
This man, he was leaving her perplexed
She reached him and kissed him hard

Husain Daud Abidi at 9:41am March 30

Golden tears of princess on the knight's face fell
He woke up like she had broken a spell
She ran her hands on his forehead
He looked at her eyes waiting for something to be said

Suddenly a black smoke covered the scene
Knight startled and princess Screamed
From out of the shadows of undead
A mysterious fire had started to spread

Jonathan Marpaung at 1:13pm March 30

"Flee!" cried the knight and together they ran
Deeper and deeper into the fiend's den
Away from the flame which engulfs a man
Into the unknown into the beast's pen

Twisting and turning the labyrinth before them
Until they exhausted and collapsed in each others arms
Breathless, yet in ecstasy, all they could fathom
But their quest didn't end as they lay in their charms

Husain Daud Abidi at 7:29pm March 30

Cruel was the fire
Intense was the game
They were lying in each other's arms
And their love was still the same

Bleeding Were The feet
Emotions were discreet
So Intense they hugged each other
As a new born child is hugged by his mother

Catherine Tanoto at 10:24pm March 30

In that darkest place there came disgusting creatures
Not only one, but many being ravenous
They clapped desiring how to cut them in fractures
Myriad ways were thought by the knight out of his cleverness

The lady, scared but felt brave at the same moment
In that lost memory and tension, she was still in question
This man, she found many things in common
Her heart was beating fast between fear and compunction

Husain Daud Abidi at 5:01pm March 31

Fire was Spreading and creatures were on the loose
Narrow was there life and death to choose
Princess came behind knight as a calf
Knight took out his sword and started to slice creatures in half

he was battling with extreme desire
The creatures he killed he threw it in the fire
But the battle was thousands against the one
So once again he held princess's hand and started to run

Catherine Tanoto at 12:11pm April 1

On their way out of the dungeon they were lost in despair
Running all the way incessantly and with pressure
The lady couldn't stand despite she was in pair
Cos then she felt her head hurt as in fissure

"Go away, leave me!" she told the knight
Tears was all over her but she was definite
The knight wouldn't survive if she was with him tight
One thing for sure, her love was infinite

Husain Daud Abidi at 3:44pm April 1

Knight Stunned, Looked once the lady
And Suddenly all the exhaust went fady
Bathed in Sweat He Froze in his Spot
To be or not to be he knew not

The Princess was crying fire was spreading
All the hopes in her eyes were deading
suddenly when the desperation overlapped like a shot of Gun
Knight held the princess in his arms and started to run

Catherine Tanoto at 12:25pm April 14

Hours passed, ultimately they saw a shed of light
Leading their way out of that horrible pit
They ran faster, and the monsters were out of sight
Feeling blissful where their hearts could safely sit

The way out was blocked by a big stone
Hardly could the knight move that thing
But with love, persistence in the tone
The big rock moved, and light gave them blink

Husain Daud Abidi at 10:32pm April 14

So came out they from endless pit and started to run
Their bodies were now shining by the sun
They looked back at the pit and it was about to blast
Diving to the ground Knight took cover of princess fast

Kabooom the cave blew and came out the black smoke
Knight looked at the princess and she was in a state of choke
Knight wiped her lips off the dust
He then fixed his lips to princess with a thrust

Catherine Tanoto at 10:38 pm April 15

The kiss from the knight was utterly delicate
The princess looked up and all seemed illusory
Their love, struggle only they could elucidate
After all, the monsters, the fights all were just cursory

"Has it ended?" Princess conceived
In the hug, with the smile and the look on the knight's face
"Who cares?" The princess perceived
All she would do was feeling their hearts' pace

Husain Daud Abidi at 5:53pm April 17

Was that the end no it was not
The earth began to Shake On the spot
From underneath the earth dug a hole
A serpent emerged gigantic in whole

Knight glanced at the princess then at the serpent
Serpent glanced at their sweaty bodies shining radiant
Like a thief approaches a precious gem light
Serpent began to approach the princess and the knight

Jonathan Marpaung at 7: 32 pm May 5

It taunted them as it circled the two
Casting gusts of wind in the wake of its movements
Dwarfed in size, it's scales could not be cut through
Both knight and lady relived their last moments

They held tight to each other as the snake drew near
Its tongue flicked out in anticipation of the prey
And as the duo were going to give in to their fear
Along came Kevin to save the day

Catherine Tanoto at 1: 38 pm May 13

Kevin rescued and they ran fast
Suddenly a flash of light came out in the dark night
It was the flash of a sword the princess saw at last
The sword was reaching fast towards the knight

Princess' last fear was the knight came to die
So without further ado, she came and received the blade
She said "I love you, goodbye" in the darkest night shade
And with that the princess gave her last breath and die

Husain Daud Abidi at 4:38pm May 13

Knight In desperation hugged the princess
he burried his head in her heart and felt riches
Then he knew his fate wasn't cheating
He still felt her heart beating

The blade had venom and it was spreading fast
The princess still had a few breaths to last
So the knight sucked out all the venom looking at the sky
The venom spread though his blood taking away his life

Catherine Tanoto at 5:17 pm May 13

That would be so much better, the knight regret
Cos when he opened his eyes, this is no lie
The princess frail, so delicate, so pallid
yet, she was no longer there and she died

Knight wished he could turn back time
That he died instead of his sweetheart
But the story wasn't like this, it's hard
The princess died for him, he would not waste his time

Husain Daud Abidi at 6: 49 pm May 13

At last princess opened her eyes to find the knight dead
She dreamt of her love in pain and sobbing her death
It was a sleep but this was real
she wondered at her heart pain so in appeal

Then Kevin came and wiped the princess tears
She was still so beautiful like brittany spears
Kevin gave princess another reason a bliss
he moved her lips closer and gave a passionate kiss

Catherine Tanoto at 7:01 pm May 13

Oh that was again only Kevin's darkest mind
The Knight sighed and buried the princess
He knew he had to live and be fine
cos what he had with her were gone into pieces

As for Kevin, he then tried to kill the knight
cos in his darkest psyche, he hated that warrior
How could this guy miss the blade meant to scythe?
And killed the woman he loved in ulterior

Husain Daud Abidi at 4:37 pm May 19

But jus when knight was weeping with a crave
A hand rose out from underneath the grave
The knight was startled and was frozen
Princess tore outta grave with power of dozen

Her eyes were flaming red, her teeth were pointed long
she was possessed by some evil spirit very strong
she jumped on the knight before he could recover
held him by the throat and choked life out of him sooner

Catherine Tanoto at 10:12 pm May 19

Afterwards, the princess woke up from the spell
And yes, that's true how evil had consumed her entity
She looked down and saw her man not well
died in fact and was supposed to be the end and it's pity

So, she decided, no this is not ended yet
She would then go for the knight's knife
She saw she could actually become his loving wife
and too bad she killed herself to be the safest heart bet

Catherine Tanoto at 10:15 pm May 19

She woke up and saw her knight
On the balcony with the shimmering light
Oh, is this heaven or hell
Who cares? She's with her knight and he's well

And so they died, and met in afterlife
They looked at each other and heck
even in afterlife their love is back
Cos that's better than not being together in life

Feeling crabby

2009-08-18T12:46:00.000-07:00

Sometimes in this life, no matter how positive a person is, there is a downside moment. And reflecting my own self, I used to be a positive girl, and I thought I could tolerate all types of behavior. However, we are so imperfect and I am only a human. Is this even a justification? That we are human is not a justification for me to feel like this. Part of me wanna kill, and part of me simply wanna tolerate...This is really a slippery slope towards my ideology.

This is 2.56 am when I am writing this, and I am growing crabby, cantankerous, bad-tempered, aarrrghhh...all words that describe this negativity inside me...
I used to have close friends but almost three years we have never contacted each other due to some irrevocable differences of personalities. They are older, and i knew them as slanderer. They liked to vilify anyone they think as attacking their security. I of course didn't give a damn.

Recently, however, i heard bad rumors about me from my another past close friend. He told me what they talked to him, and i am glad that he told me before mushrooming the situation. But the problem is, what those women told about me to people weren't true! They had arranged their stories in such a way that I found them as such backstabbers who feel insecure with themselves that they have to gossip about people all the time.

God, please help me forgive them! Right now, I just wanna kill!

Having a high fever again

2009-08-05T22:36:00.001-07:00

I just came back from Surabaya and now I am in complete mess. My head is spinning around, and what I can do but whining and whining. Well, whining is not the only thing I do, I also have taken my medicine, but yesterday I missed an important date. I was supposed to attend Welly's graduation. He is my best friend, but what to do? I'm having a high fever. Hiks...Hiks...

Anyhow, I hope he will get job soon and congrats!

Wednesday's movies

2009-06-30T22:00:00.000-07:00

1. Nim's Island

It's good drama, nice adventurous movie...:)

2. Finding Neverland

Good, fascinating! Wow...watch this! That is how Peter Pan was made!

3. Seven Pounds

Sad, touching and good movie. It's a bit ridiculous way of showing redemption and also noblest one.

Tuesday's movies... :)

2009-06-29T11:48:00.000-07:00

1. College Road Trip

Very entertaining, two thumbs up family movie! Must watch!

2. Sex and the City movie

This movie is great in fact. Watch it, I'm sure u'll like it. I find it entertaining.

3. Kit Kittredge an American Girl

Superb, one of the best drama... Gosh!!!! Two thumbs up!!

Movie I watch today...^_^ (Holiday, yippie!)

2009-06-29T03:08:00.000-07:00

Dhoom 2 (Hindi movie)

Fantastic! Very cool action movie!

Movies I am watching in this weekend, Saturday and Sunday...:)

2009-06-27T06:56:00.001-07:00

Well, these Saturday and Sunday I watched these movies, lemme give an abrupt opinion :)

1. The Hunchback of Notre Dame (Disney's classical animation)

Awesome!

2. Om Shanti Om (Hindi Movie)

so funny, sad and touching, and nice

3. Tarzan ke Kota (Indonesian movie)

shitty movie...It's really not my type, tho some of the scenes are funny as in this comedy movie. But overall, bad and boring...

4. Out of time

The first hour of this movie is boring, Another not-that-nice movie for me, but it gets better at least in the next hour.

5. Dhoom 1 (Hindi Movie)

Wow, this is another blockbusting bollywood movie. Very cool, highly recommended! Action-packed, well a bit too flashy, but never mind...It's cool

The Hunchback of Notre Dame, must-watch Disney animation :)

2009-06-26T11:48:00.001-07:00

Beauty is not skin deep. Sometimes this world is just so cruel to judge people from outward appearance. As the classical Disney movie "The Hunchback of Notre Dame" suggests, I am reminded that beauty is not something you can see. It's what you can't see. Beauty is the fabulous-looking cover that attracts you attention to a book. But it's the writing inside that holds your attention.

So, here the movie (adapted from novel of Victor Hugo) goes: The action starts with Frollo (the bad guy in the movie) chasing a family through the streets of Paris. Intent on a bit of ethnic cleansing, he wants to rid the city of Gypsies and is obsessed with finding the Court of Miracles, their secret hiding place. After dashing the mother's head against the steps of Notre Dame, Frollo grabs what he thinks is some stolen loot she's been carrying, discovers it's a malformed baby and moves to throw it down a well, eager to send the "unholy demon back to hell."

A watching priest saves the baby and absolves Frollo -- provided he agrees to be the boy's guardian. Dubbed Quasimodo ("half formed"), the hunchback is locked in the cathedral, destined to become its bell ringer.

During the 1482 Festival of Fools in Paris, Quasimodo, the hunchback of Notre Dame, is elected the Pope of Fools for being the ugliest person in Paris finds himself falling instantly in love with the Gypsy dancer Esmeralda. Joy turns quickly to sorrow as the crowd cruelly mocks and rejects him for his misshapen appearance, failing to see the charm which lies below his odd looks.

Back in the safety of the Cathedral, Quasimodo is at first heartbroken to find that Esmeralda is in love with another, yet he ultimately risks everything to bring the two lovers together. Yeah, love is not only about possession, it's also about letting go...:) In the end, the entire city of Paris owes Quasimodo a great debt as he teaches the people the important lesson of acceptance and love. Paris learns to appreciate the unique values of the outcast Gypsies and the disfigured hunchback.

Well, well, well, this is two thumbs up movie. So, you'd better watch this. One of the best Disney's classical animation. *****

Ghajini, this movie is touching! T T

2009-06-22T09:41:00.000-07:00

I just finished watching Ghajini, Husain and Nayla said the movie rocks, and my friend, Rahul has sent me the soundtracks of the movie. It's cool... Ok, what is this movie about? Everybody, I recommend watching this Hindi movie. It's another awesome Bollywood film.

So, here we go.

Sanjay is a big affluent businessman who falls in love with a model Kalpana. Like Sanjay, Kalpana is a kind-hearted woman who always helps the poor people. No wonder, she runs into trouble with a gang that supplies girls to Mumbai as she exposes them. A retaliatory attack by the gang led by Ghajini who in the end kills Kalpana.

Sanjay, who tries to save her is hit on the head, which causes a memory loss. He can remember things only for 15 minutes. He is hunting for a person named Ghajini , and to remember his target, he has inscribed his initials and related clues on his body, has pasted post-it notes all across his apartment and carries a Polaroid camera to click pictures of people important to him.

Sanjay is helped by medical student Chitra. Though she wants to study Sanjay’s case in detail, her professor tells her not to do so as there is a police case against him. How she manages to get even with the gang forms the climax.

An investigating officer gets hold of Sanjay’s daily diary when he investigated his apartment gives a background account of Sanjay’s character. I am personally surprised of how good the act of Amir Khaan is as Sanjay, cos when the flashback begins, we can see that Sanjay the murderer and Sanjay the businessman are like two different people. One is so disorganized and full of hatred, and the later is so handsome and cool, but those two characters are one person. The diary changes hands from the inspector to a medical student, Chitra, but the flashback account continues to stretch from the first half to the second with a long-drawn-out love story between the Sanjay and Kalpana.

At its core, Ghajini is essentially a romance track culminating into a revenge drama. But this movie is full of suspense and very romantic. Two thumbs up. It's action-packed for those who love actions, and romantic, enigmatic and also touching. Prepare to cry also. :) ****

A sense of nature

2009-06-21T13:58:00.000-07:00

What a serene view, isn’t it? A certain Thai guy I met in Bali took it. He’s such a good photographer. Sometimes, I’m so occupied with my work that I barely take a stroll and enjoy the beauty of nature. It may be in clump of flowers, a colourful bird, a magnificent tree, or a striking vista. I really hope I can enjoy this kind of view again soon!

Laaga Chunari Mein Daag - Journey of a Woman (2007)

2009-06-18T21:42:00.000-07:00

A fascinating blend of musical, melodrama and feminist fairy tale, "Laaga Chunari Mein Daag" shows Bollywood’s moral universe in transition.

The film follows the fortunes of Badki (Rani Mukherjee) and Chutki (Konkona Sen Sharma), sisters from a Benares family with money problems and predatory relatives.

Father is an honest employee who refuses to sign false documents and thus is deprived of his pension – the sole source of income for the family. Family consists of one wife and two daughters. Mother takes over and makes both ends meet by sewing petticoats. Father, in the mean time, buys lottery tickets ..and wastes money basically – this kind of gambling is I guess alright for the otherwise honest man – this means he is a loser as a man and as a husband – for he is of no help to his wife.

When Badki leaves to find work in Bombay (as everyone in the film still calls the sin city currently known as Mumbai), “Laaga” really takes off.

Badki decides to go to Bombay to fetch some financial support for her family. She tries her luck in Beauty parlors – leaves it for maybe she finds it below her dignity to sweep floors and do pedicure for customers, joins a departmental store but is ousted for she could not understand or speak English !Tries to become a movie assistant but one has to move ones butt real fast – so she is kicked out from there as well.

At last she reaches a Call Center and happens to met a debauch married male who promises to give her the job if she agrees to sleep with him ! She rings up her mother – who is very busy running helter-skelter collecting money to attend to her hubby’s sudden heart attack. His heart is attacked upon hearing that they will have to vacate the house by the way. Badki tells her mother that she wants to come back for the people here in Bombay are very cheap – but her mother denies and says that she had better not come back and ask her for money instead.

There, Badki — with no diploma and no skills — becomes Natasha: a high-priced prostitute. The movie isn’t coy about this. “I’ve fallen from grace,” she says. “I can never come back.” But she manages to make a lot of money, paying for her family's expenses, sister's education, furnishing their house in Benares, and all of a sudden they became so rich.

Thus she makes a whole lot of money and starts sending it to her parents – only her mother knows what she is doing, her father and sister are blissfully unaware of her business. Only an absolute dumb idiot will not realize this – which her father probably was - for its not possible for a non-english speaking, unsmart woman to earn such exorbitantly high amount of money in a matter of a couple of months!

Chutki’s story is lighter. M.B.A. in hand, she joins her sister in the city, where she gets a job in advertising. Her first task is to sell Lux soap to the modern Indian woman. And who is that creature? As her boss (and future husband) discovers, Chutki herself — bright, spunky, self-assured — fits the bill.

Badki, on the other hand, meets a guy – another rich Industrialist – who falls for her. In the last scene , that guy proposes Badki but she tells him that she is a Prostitute. He says that he knows it from day one but it does not really matter to him. Wow!!

One day, Chutki finds out what her sister is doing, she is so furious with herself and sad for not being able to save her sister. She asks for Badki's apology. It is a very emotional moment when two of them cry for forgiveness. Chutki won’t allow her sister to be shunned. Instead of keeping the stain a dark secret, Chutki insists on honesty and that the family reintegrate Badki.

Ms. Sharma hits all the right notes as Chutki, the film’s conscience and clown. Through her, “Laaga” rejects tragedy and embraces its musical comedy heart. The Hindi title — literally “a stain on my veil” — means “fallen woman.” But here Badki gets back up, becoming, with her sister, that special thing: the modern Indian woman.

I think that this movie is a portrayal of a reality. It shows to us why most women become prostitutes, and they are only human. But what is mostly shown is the power of forgiveness, how fallen women actually can come back if they want to come back.

This movie is a good Hindi movie, not two thumbs up but good. ***

Is it a crime to be single?

2009-06-18T00:28:00.000-07:00

Recently I read from the Jakarta Post, a really intriguing article which I would like to share with you.

A person commented on two local movies that enraged him. No, it’s not because they’re badly written, poorly executed or starred a model trying hard to be an actress. It’s the message that annoyed him, the "Go get married or you’ll be doomed" message. Oh, please.

This is exactly like our society. Mothers always ask their children, to get married, especially if their sons or daughters reach the age of 25s. Over and over and over to the point that it just gets too much. Okay, I understand every mother’s wish to see their children married. It’s only human. Who wouldn’t like a joyous wedding followed by more babies to fill this overcrowded world? But, hey, this doesn’t mean that the single ones are sick, right.

A lot of lines in the film will make singletons feel they did something bad, that they won’t reach ‘good son’ status until they are married. And that life won’t be complete without your other half.

Sure. Now watch those infotainment shows and you’ll see how many married couples are filing divorce paper and crying over splitting the TV.

We should know that it doesn’t take marriage papers to be happy. But this doesn’t mean you have to be single to be happy, either. The thing is, there shouldn always be choice for everyone to decide what they want to be - single or not.

When a girl over 20 comes to a wedding, you can bet she’ll be asked by a whole troupe,"Where’s your boyfriend?" When she brings the boyfriend, unfortunately, the question changes,"When are you getting married?" When she’s married, it’s ,"Any plans on having a baby soon?" The vicious circle just won’t end.

The thing is, everyone thinks being with someone will make them happier. I’m not saying it can’t, but in the 21st century, it’s sad to judge someone’s life based on their love life.

Against all else, we should know the more important question to ask someone you care is,"Are you happy?"

People look and long for love, naturally. Some through marriage, some from their friends, some from family. Millions of people want to get married, but maybe millions of others don’t. There’s nothing wrong with either, so don’t judge one side from another. Honestly, is it a crime to be single?

The International Youth Camp 2009, day 5

2009-06-16T23:04:00.000-07:00

TRIP TO LAKE TOBA!!! Wow!!

I had to wake up at 5 am that day, I was still so sleepy, lousy girl I am, and that time, Welly and Adi woke me up and forced me to come by calling and calling me. Thanks, dudes.

Lake Toba is located 4 hour journey by bus and it was the best natural view we had in North Sumatra. Lake Toba was also the nomination of the 7th wonder, and it's the largest volcanic lake in the world. As a Medan citizen, I went there one or two times in a year.

In this International Youth Camp, we all got the chance to go there again with the delegates, and Lake Toba that time was so hot...

with Kim Jung Hwan, the Korean guy.

Then we cruised on a ferry, the boat that crosses from Parapat to Samosir island. You can see the pictures below on the ferry...

At Tomok, we did shopping and negotiating prices for the delegates so they wouldn't be cheated...

These are the traditional houses of Batak tribe.

Lake Toba, it has breathtaking views. I suggest everybody to come to Lake Toba when visiting North Sumatra. It's wonderful! And we departed right at sunset time, and I reached my home at almost midnight. What a fun day!

As for my health, well, it's not as worst as the previous days. :)

The International Youth Camp 2009, day 4

2009-06-16T21:31:00.000-07:00

Ok the schedule for day 4 on 14th of June was like this:

09.00-12.00 Attending Fashion Show (national dress)

Above: From Malaysia

Above: From Philippines

Above: From Singapore (though I believe the national dress that they were wearing belong to India, hehe, salwar/ punjabi suit)

Above: From Thailand

So, during this, the delegates will show their national dress, like the Koreans would wear their hanbok, their national dress, and Indonesians would wear kebaya. I didn't join this one, hiks, I know, too bad, but I was so badly having my fever. I was glad to still come in the afternoon, cos no matter what I have pledged myself not to let my university down.

03.00--03.30 Leaving for SMAN1 Medan (high school) and "Taman Beringin" (Beringin Park)

03.30- 05.30 Informal meeting at SMAN1 Medan and Planting friendship trees at Beringin Park (collaboration with green teachers Indonesia, Local government and University of Sumatera Utara)

So, for this one I joined. We were given the same sweatshirts, BUT my sweattshirt was too large for me, hiks, but It's ok and we had to plant friendship trees called Gaharu trees, but prior to that we still had to join a meeting at SMAN1 Medan, it's one of the top high schools in Medan. There were some dances and speeches again. Here was a glimpse.

Then, we went to Beringin Park for planting frienship trees.

All of the delegates were classified in their own countries, Thailand had its own special area, as well as China, Korea, Singapore, and so on. Even my university, USU (University of Sumatera Utara) had its own space. Even I am from Medan, but I am a Chinese, cos of my Chinese blood and a little bit Japanese from grandpa, so I call myself Chinese Indonesian. That's why the Chinese delegates asked me and Yose to join them in planting tree in the China space, and I did that. ^_^

Above: The Chinese delegate

Above: Yose and I were with the Chinese delegates planting Gaharu tree.

And I also had my university space...

Then, from the park, we went home and we had a closing ceremony to attend in the evening around 7.30 pm. And I was told abruptly that I would be the valedictorian, you know, a speaker who gave speech about impression and stuffs, and so that night I gave my sudden, nearly impromptu speech, and thank God, it went successfully.

I got my certificate that night, and oh well, what a farewell party it turned.

Indeed, I have learnt some things from this event:

1. The entrepreneurship itself

What is entrepreneurship? What is the government's role in the youth empowerment, entreprenurship in particular? And what are the drawbacks of youth entrepreneurship in Asian countries?

2. Culture

- Indonesian culture is rich, Bataknese dances are cool

- The cross culture between the delegates and Indonesians

3. Friendship

Making friends is something that I will always treasure in my life. Thank God I met a lot of nice friends from different countries.

Go for Youth International Youth Camp!

P.S: We still had one trip to go the next day, but that was out of the program, only a tour as a bonus from the program, we went to Lake Toba, I would share about this one in the next post.

The International Youth Camp 2009, day 3

2009-06-16T01:51:00.001-07:00

The third day, we also had to attend opening ceremony in Batubara Regency, it's four hour journey from Medan by big bus, but before that in the morning there was a group discussion, in which the topics are: Small-Medium Enterprise Development Strategy to Enhance People Welfare, Strategy to develop the spirit of Entrepreneurship, and Pioneering the ASEAN youth Business Community, well I can't say much about this forum as I didn't join, I slept and had a bad fever the day before... :(

But around 10 am, I came. Mona kept calling me to come, so then, I came, and luckily, I wasn't late for Batubara Regency trip. The bus departed at around 10 pm. We reached there around 2 pm and It was a tiring journey...

Yeah, this was the place, and the bus that brought us here could not get in to that small lane, so we had to walk, it's about 30 minute walk, even more tiring, hiks, we were about to go the a beach called Perjuangan Beach (translate Beach of Struggle), there was an opening ceremony, again, hehe for International Festival in Youth and Sports.

walking and walking and finally...

we reached the spot, and these people kept taking pictures, hehe

We walked and we found out that the beach was so crowded. Look at this! :O

Many and many people were there to celebrate the opening ceremony of the festival, and there were many dances, bataknese (one of the tribes in Indonesia) dances in particular.

The two people in middle were from China. They were very friendly, and the guy was a bit silent and cool. But we talked several times, and I can spot the difference between my Chinese language and theirs, hehe, but still, the Chinese blood is there, so feel like meeting brother and sister. Wish I could go to China. And here, the dances were performed:

I think these were welcoming dances known in Batak culture.

And here I was sitting down with friends, really tired, having fever, and really didn't know why I still survived.

Now, see the close up, I was with Marina, my junior, Mona, my best friend, and Hotma, my close male friend... Nice...

above: With the Thai people, Ohm and Via...

It's very hot here, but well even there's a guy sitting in his parachute, and bringing the advertisement...Pheewh, can't imagine being him, must be very hot up there...

(Look at the picture below) Then, what was so amazing was, the skydivers dived and jumped from Hercules airplane very high above...

Can you see the parachutes? Ok take a closer look when one was about to go down...

After this magnificent skydivers, we had 640 students in that region performing dances, 8 different dances according to tribes existing in that region...

The picture below was Sigale Gale dance, very entertaining with the puppets...

And when they finished dancing, the sunset came and we went back to Medan.

It was four hour journey or even more that time, cos we still stopped to eat in the restaurant. It was a tiring journey, I was so knackered and very sick plus my fever and headache. I reached my home at almost 12 midnight and threw up a lot. Bad health! But u see, I was having fun...

The International Youth Camp 2009, day 2

2009-06-15T19:47:00.000-07:00

I was sick and the days were hectic and so I didn't get the chance to update my blog on this event, but now, I am going to write day to day activity. Day two was the presentation day and workshop + attending opening ceremony for exhibition. So, in the morning, the delegates had to present their entrepreneurship program of each country, how to grow the initiatives and youth roles on empowering entrepreneurs. Well, it was fun cos I could get to know what was the drawbacks of other countries in empowering youth in entrepreneurship.

I mean, I am not the type of the woman who is really into entrepreneurship, so I should say this is new thing and educative.

We also had a seminar from Mr Michael R Rouse, the Deputy Counsul of United States Consulate Medan and Mr.Rudy Sofyan, my lecturer and also Mr.Iskandar Sembiring, the Secretary General of Corporate Forum Community Development. I was so sleepy during this moment, when Mr.Rousek came, it was great and then Mr. Sofyan, even better, cos he had a good way of presenting and convincing, but when Mr. Sembiring came, I was definitely about to close my eyes...

€€€€

Then, from this workshop, we had to attend the opening ceremony of the exhibition held in Lapangan Benteng ( means Benteng field). It was around 2 pm that time, so hot, so crowded, hehe, I drank two glasses of iced tea. ;)

This was before the opening ceremony of the exhibition started...

And you know what I was doing there? Hehe, EAT...!

Actually, I wasn't feeling very well that time, I was having fever, but oh well, I could not miss this event or else I would be scolded by my university, I had fun anyway. There were welcoming dances as well...

with the Thai guy named Ohm at my right side wearing white.

Afterwards, we came back to Dharma Deli Hotel and listened to a famous motivational speaker Mr.Agus Sunario, CEO Strategy Center, and he's a great speaker though I don't agree with him all the time, but I can learn some things from him.

So, then, this is the end of hectic day 2, I was having fun and at night, my nosebleeding ran even worse...:(

The International Youth Camp 2009, day 1

2009-06-11T01:25:00.000-07:00

This is so nice. My friends and I are invited to join The International Youth Camp which is hosted in Medan on 11-15th June 2009. The partipants are from Brunei Darussalam, Vietnam, Cambodia, Singapore, Malaysia, China, Japan, Korea, Thailand, and United States.

I thought that we would just be invited in a dinner party tonight, but this morning in the meeting session with my campus friends and lecturers, I was told that we will join a five-day training and fun session with the other Asian Participants. This is an International Event, so we really have to behave and bring good name to our country and specifically to our university.

Anyway, I got a nice bag from the committee to keep my seminar kit. Awesome!

And we were going to have a dinner in Dharma Deli hotel, this was when I was with friends to register this afternoon.

Then, at night time, we had dinner, and there were few speeches from the committee, the Mayor, and the Ministry, and we had some dances...Poco poco dance, and batak dance...

with the Cambodian guys, Ros Phearak and You Kim Leng and my friends, Welly, Adi and Hotma.

dancing bataknese dance, hehehe

Anyway, this dinner took longer than supposed to be, I couldn't stand after some while, I have my big fever coming, so I went home earlier, and now my head is still spinning around actually. I have got my nosebleeding, I really hope there's nothing wrong with me... Tomorrow, I have a packed schedule for the youthcamp, so goodnight everyone.

Tara Rum Pum movie rocks!!!

2009-06-10T06:28:00.000-07:00

The power of love and togetherness can sometimes be so strong that it can make you go through the thick and thin of life with a smile on your face. This is the gist of Yashraj Film’s latest presentation ‘Tara Rum Pum’.

Ever since his childhood Rajveer has been passionate about race cars. After the death of his parents, Rajveer dropped out of college and started working in the pit-crew of a racing team. On a fortunate day, Rajeev’s life changes forever after he meets Harry who would become Rajeev’s future manager. On the same day, Rajeev also meets the woman of his dreams, Radhika.

Radhika likes to plan everything meticulously in her life. Rajveer and Radhika are as different as chalk and cheese. He lives for the moment and doesn’t think much of future. She, on the other hand, plans every move of her life carefully.

She is the doted daughter of the owner of one of the biggest software companies in the world. Radhika is a music student. One single day turned Radhika’s properly thought out life topsy turvy when she meets Rajveer during a cab ride. From then on, Radhika’s life was never the same.

Rajveer’s talent is discovered by Harry and he joins ‘Speeding Saddles’, a failing race team. After his very first win in the race, Rajeev falls in love with Radhika. A music student and a racer don't somehow seem like the best of matches, but the opposites do attract in this case.

There is something about Rajveer that attracts Radhika. May be it’s his flamboyance or his madness and energy. Barely two days after meeting him, Radhika found herself sitting in the stands of the New York Speedway, and cheering RV to win the race.

Love between RV and Radhika blossoms and culminates into marriage. Over the years, the couple is blessed with two kids Princess and Champ.

The girl’s name is Priya but her parents lovingly call her ‘Princess’. She loves her Dad, Mama, her younger brother Champ and Bruno (their dog).

Ranveer is the younger one of the siblings. Everyone fondly calls him ‘Champ’ because he was born on a day when his papa won a big race. Champ has two passions: cars and burgers.

The happy life of this loving family is thrown off track after RV meets a serious accident on the race track. Tragedy strikes when RV is pushed to the corner in a car race by a new racer called Rusty. RV is hospitalized for a few months. When he tries to make a comeback after recuperating, he realizes that he has lost his edge on the racing track. After a series of losses, RV loses his job and Rusty is signed on in his place.

Unable to pay their loans and debts, RV and Radhika lose their home and have to shift to a low-class cabbie neighborhood in New York.

It is now that the family’s love and bonding is tested. To keep their children out of the strain and stress of poverty, RV and Radhika create a masquerade that they have to live in poor conditions as a part of a reality show. If they win they will get a big prize.

Moving on, even as RV and Radhika struggle to make ends meet, every member of the family makes sacrifice for the other.

There comes a situation when RV needs huge amount of money to save his son. And he gets a golden opportunity to drive in another car race. And yes, he did it and managed to save his son’s life!

The family struggles to survive a life that they are not used to, using a mixture of fantasy and cheerfulness to pull through in the face of adversity.

‘Tara Rum Pum’ is not so much of a romantic story than a story of familial bonding. It is about how a couple and their two kids face the hardships of life with a smile on their face. It is about how a man overcomes his inner fears for the sake of his loved ones.

I love this Hindi movie!!Very much recommended!

What a day!

2009-06-09T06:52:00.000-07:00

These two days I have been adjudicating in Kopertis 1 debate. As messy as the competition has been, I will say, luckily my friends and I came as observer, and later on called as adjudicators.

There has been many misunderstandings on the implementation of BP system in debate, the confusion about POI, and many more. Well, the committee didn't call my friends and me to help, so why bother?

Anyhow, in the end, committee had realised their mistakes and therefore, we cleaned their mess, and had a fun and confusing debate to watch, hehe

Now, the competition is done, and my head is spinning as the result of the brain damage after seeing lousy logic...

But we thank God, overall, everything has gone not too far from expectation. ^_^

Just bought some books...

2009-06-07T09:05:00.000-07:00

Just bought some books today:

1. The Chronicles of Narnia, COMPLETE! Seven of them...

2. Septimus Heap, three of them, they are:

- SEPTIMUS HEAP, Magyk

- SEPTIMUS HEAP, Flyte

- SEPTIMUS HEAP, Physik

not yet complete, the fourth is yet to come...

Hehe, so, I have added them in my collections, now I have almost 500 books in my collections, novels and comic books... I don't really read comic books anymore, I should say.

Anyway, I will read the books and write the review soon. Can't wait to finish all these books. Oh, and the books that I bought just now was a fantasy book... I am all about fantasy.:)

The Tale of Despereaux

2009-06-06T05:05:00.000-07:00

Once upon a time there was a charming tale of a wee little mouse with wide-open eyes and ears as large as saucers. Named Despereaux Tilling, the mouse grew up, though not by much, to become a reader of books and the besotted friend of a lovely human princess named Pea. In time he saved the day, battling an army of rats.

Despereaux has to triumph over both his home life (he’s far too bold for the other mice) and the forces of darkness shrouding Dor. What’s particularly sweet about his journey is that it begins with a book he was supposed to nibble, not read. I am so impressed when Despereaux read it and really made me picture all that...:) The story he reads is a fairy tale about a sad princess and a brave knight, an adventure that periodically springs to expressive life because Despereaux doesn’t merely read this tale, he visualizes it so we see it too.

This movie also has a wonderful moral for children, even for us. Despereaux transforms, from a bold little mouse into a great big hero, and he can do that with his chivalry, loyalty, and courage. It teaches us how important it is to have courage, and how does grief can lead us to a lot of misconducts, misunderstandings, and forgiveness just swept it all away. “The Tale of Despereaux” is on the side of kindness, not cruelty.

I find it particularly hilarious when watching the movie. First, it told us a story of Roscuro, a rat who was unique and loves light and friendship, unlike the other rats. One day, he arrived at the Kingdom of Dor, full of human being, of course...hehe, and in there, they were celebrating the SOUP DAY, so the chef is really focused on cooking the soup. Once, the soup is ready, the chef is about to present to the Queen and cos of Roscuro's falling down to the Queen's soup, the queen is shocked to death. Therefore, the king's grief over his wife makes him issue a law that soup is forbidden and rats are illegal, causing clouds over Dor for a long time and sadness...

Anyway, I really enjoy this movie, if you wanna know more, just watch it, this movie is adopted from the book by Kate DiCamillo. Very impressive, good job... Very much recommended!

Bright morning

2009-06-05T23:21:00.001-07:00

Words do not come

there is no need for profound utterances or

deep truths

here is an ordinary morning

why spoil it with dramatic overstatement

the silence amidst the noise

the gem at the core

of every experience

is polished by simple attention

into shining magnificence

Debating, eating and then teaching and then meeting my past

2009-06-05T10:21:00.000-07:00

So, today, I had heard bad news about NUEDC Kopertis 1 Aceh-Medan, and the management was terrible, there was a monopoly from certain universities' and I just knew that they will play dirty on the competition. Too bad, Medan-Aceh deserves quality competition, hiks... I hope I can manouver it but who I am afterall...Just hope for the best. I dun have any interest in this that's for sure, cos I am from state university so I won't join this terrible competition anyway...But at least... Kopertis 1 committee can be a bit cooperative...

I then helped Retno and her friend become their sparring partner this afternoon, hehe, and cos we are lack of people, as we are debating in British Parliamentary Style, I became the Opening Government, becoming the primse minister and the deputy prime minister, hehe, it's kinda nice, but I still prefer with teammate, Retno and her friend became Opening Opposition, Mona became Closing Government, and Cynthis became Closing Opposition. We debated on the motion "This House would put a minimum quota for women in politic"

Anyhow, after all that debate, we had a chit chat and then we decided to eat meatball soup (bakso) on Jl. Tengku Daud...hehe, with Novi, Retno and her girlfriend, hehe, yeah Retno is a lesbian that we all know but we accept her and she also exposes herself saying that's her choice, hehe...For me, I love man and my God too much i can never think about her choice.

Look at this!!! lol

Many people came here to eat the bakso cos it's very very hmm...delicious

Retno and her girlfriend...hehe... She is one of the bravest woman, hehe

Then from there, I had to teach...

Yeah teacher Catherine taught her how to compose simple writing hehe, using the topic of favourite movie. The girl did pretty well by writing about Lilo and Stitch, I gave her B for that, hehehe

Then from teaching, I had to meet Lucas' parents in their house, then they gave me some books that Lucas ever had, cos his parents just got back from Jakarta, so they kinda cleaned up their house in Medan, and I got some more collections of John Grisham's, hehehe, my heart is so delighted but at the same time wistful, but I think even at my darkest moment, well, Husain just broke up with me, Lucas had a way to lift me, but anyway, I am happy cos Lucas' parents didnt mention about his death anymore, that is fine with me...

So, then today isn't that bad afterall, and tonight I plan to watch 'The Tale of Despereaux', it is about a mouse, I gotta watch, tomorrow, I'll tell the story...

5th June 2009

2009-06-04T20:48:00.000-07:00

I saw his facebook status, he just got an accident, is he fine? There are many things I wanna ask him, but I am choked here, I can't move at all...only tears flowing, cos I am weak...Cos, I am no longer his, I cannot ask, I am damned worried about him, so let me just express this in my blog, cos I have no right at all, no more, he has chosen to shun away from me, not even as friend...Oh, God, hope everything is fine with him...

In my dream...

2009-06-04T20:34:00.000-07:00

Take my hand

Feel the vital grip

that love lends to this flesh

Listen to my voice

hear the catch in my throat

of awe that can't be expressed

Gaze into my eyes

see tears welling up

as I recognize my long lost self in your smile

rest in my arms

find refuge in my embrace

until you know you are forever safe

join me now

here

where we have never parted

in a dream...

Prism of love

2009-06-04T06:11:00.000-07:00

Light through a prism...

a rainbow

love through my heart...

the spectrum of feelings revealed

red anger to blue sadness

yellow fear to black despair

allow them back into the heart

and the prism works in reverse

turning the most deeply tinted pain

back into pure white love

Genghis Khan, the new book I bought yesterday

2009-06-03T21:01:00.000-07:00

So, yesterday I went to Gramedia in Grand Paladium with Mona and Novi, we were about to browse for good books, cos there was 30% discounts of all books...Cool, isn't it?

Then, as literature students, we are indeed demanded to read more and more, something that is somehow confined by time and budget...

So, here after some browsing, well, I just went to gramedia a month before and bought around 20 novels, cos I got voucher from my campus as a gift to purchase books, ;) and therefore, yesterday, I didn't feel like buying anymore, until I saw one book that caught my attention...

Here it is: GENGHIS KHAN Life, death and resurrection by John Man

And the review is the following:

In The Washington Post, Genghis Khan was named as "the most important man" of the last millennium. By barbarous criteria, it was an unanswerable choice. Genghis Khan conquered more people than Napoleon or Alexander. He ordered and inspired more massacres than any other tyrant before Hitler and Stalin. He destroyed more states, razed more cities, demolished more monuments, uprooted more fields than any predecessor. He left at his death an unequalled reputation for lust and bloodlust. "My greatest joy," he was remembered for saying, "is to shed my enemies' blood, wring tears from their womenfolk and take their daughters for bedding."

If recent research in Oxford's biochemistry department is to be believed, he was one of history's most philoprogenitive studs, with 16 million living descendents. Meanwhile, he made the streets of Beijing - according to an imaginative eye-witness - "greasy with the fat of the slain". His tally of victims in Persia amounted to millions.

In the long run, however, he was a constructive destroyer. His empire , at his death in 1227, spanned Eurasia, creating havens of peace around the silk roads and steppelands. Accelerated contacts enriched Eurasian civilisations. Technologies that trans- formed Europe's future - gunpowder, the blast furnace, paper money - arrived in the West. Traditions of scientific empiricism, dormant in Europe since antiquity, revived as Westerners began to share attitudes to nature formerly confined to China. Italian merchants, French craftsmen and Franciscan missionaries met in the depths of the Gobi.

It all might have happened anyway: trans-Eurasian trade had begun to grow in the previous century. Europe's "scientific renaissance" might have thrived on unaided stimulation from contacts with the Muslim world. But Genghis Khan's "Mongol Peace" made cultural cross-fertilisation possible on an unprecedented scale.

We know maddeningly little about about him. Today, his memory is twisted between myths. In Mongolia, under Communism, he was an almost unmentionable "deviationist" who detracted from the "peace-loving" image Mongolians tried to project. Now he is a national hero. In his own day, he toyed with similarly contradictory images: a warlord who intimidated enemies into submission by massacre; an avenger of insults to his dynasty and tribe; an embodiment of Mongol convictions of superiority over sedentary peoples; a scourge of heaven, divinely appointed to chastise a wicked world; a law-giver and architect of enduring empire.

In surviving documents, he addressed different audiences with conflicting messages. To Muslims, he was an instrument of God, to the Chinese a candidate for the Mandate of Heaven, to Mongols a giver of victory and of the treasure it brought. When he addressed monks and hermits he stressed his own asceticism. "Heaven is weary of the inordinate luxury of China," he declared. "I have the same rags and the same food as cowherds and grooms, and I treat the soldiers as my brothers."

When he appealed for sages to help him govern, "I have not myself excellent qualities for governing," he wrote - aping the mock-modesty of the mandarins. In 1219, a Taoist magus answered his call, crossing the Gobi desert, through "mountains of huge cold", where travellers smeared their horses with blood to discourage demonic assailants. When at last he reached the Mongol headquarters at the foot of the Hindu Kush, the khan's first question was, "Master, what is the secret of eternal life?"

John Man unashamedly confronts the dearth of sources by interpolating passages of personal experience. He gives us a first-rate travel book, not so much a life of the khan as a search for him: full of frustrations with frontier transport, vivid descriptions of otherness, and encounters with amusing cicerones. Man swims in the Yellow river, through water "thick enough to eat". Following the route of the khan's last campaign in China, he finds, at the "Treasure Mountain", "a couple of aged guardians with gold teeth and glasses held together with massive hinged clasps". In the museum of Guyuan, after "tea and noodles", he is surprised to see an ancient Persian vase, decorated with scenes of the siege of Troy. He interpolates a recipe for a Mongol casserole, cooked over a fire of dried dung: "First shoot your marmot... Into your marmot-skin bag, insert meat and red-hot stones... Ignore attached dung, ashes, etc." He interrogates peasants for the place of the khan's burial, tacking between discarded insights and short-lived enthusiasms, until only legends are left.

In places he retreats into "imagining" what Genghis Khan might have felt. But most of the time, he relies on spirited recapitulations of the earliest narrative sources. This is unsatisfactory, because the original texts have infuriating jump-cuts and non sequiturs.

Man's reconstructions, though tentative and teasing, are always lively and argued with élan. His excursions are sometimes over-elaborate: the last third of the book drags along after the khan's death. Much useful context is missing: there are under-exploited sources for the reconstruction of life at Genghis Khan's court and the role of power-women in influencing the politics of his seraglio.

The laws the khan encoded are an important and neglected source. To understand his rise, we need to know more not only about the khan himself, but also about the dynamics of pastoral society in the steppes, and the pressures that made the Mongols unite. But Man has scholarly gifts as well as acute intelligence and a winning way with words. This is a fine introduction to the subject, as well as a rattling good read.

Three big matters of judgement are worth questioning. First, Man thinks Genghis Khan had no ideology - only a sense of heaven-sent personal destiny. But the khan was the declarer and perhaps deviser of a justification of universal empire that continued to animate Mongol conquests for centuries: the doctrine that "as there is one sky, so there should be one empire on earth". The Mongols practised shamanism, but also cherished a shadowy religion of transcendence, worshipping Tengri, "the eternal blue heaven" that stretched between the horizons they saw across the steppe.

Secondly, Man has succumbed to the khan's charisma, endorsing the legend of his precocious vocation for power. Yet one of the big unresolved problems of Genghis Khan's life is why his talents remained inert or under-exploited for so long before his conquering career took wing. The imperial vision grew on him only gradually, as he felt his way from raiding, tribute-gathering, and exacting ransom to constructing empire with permanent institutions of rule.

Tradition alleges a turning-point: when a subordinate suggested exterminating 10 million Chinese and turning their fields to pasture for Mongol herds, Genghis Khan realised that he could profit more by sparing the peasants and taxing them. Yet it was a tentative process, of which the khan himself may have been only dimly aware as he extemporised his way to greatness.

Finally, Genghis Khan gets the credit for the Mongol blitzkrieg. But he spent 23 years subduing northern China. After his death, Mongol armies leapt beyond their natural, cavalry-friendly environment, conquering paddy-scored lands, impressing huge forces of foot, organising siege-trains and fleets, appropriating the full potential of sedentary economies to finance further wars. If Genghis Khan was "the man of the millennium", it was only because he inaugurated an enterprise and adumbrated a vision which his successors fulfilled.

So, here I bought this book translated into Indonesian become "JENGHIS KHAN Legenda sang penakluk dari Mongolia"

Is the heart big enough?

2009-06-03T09:20:00.000-07:00

The flower can only wait

for the bee to arrive

yet passion appears from nowhere

to play hide and seek with peace

all that is gained is lost once again

timeless dreams are swallowed

in the yawn of awakened sleeper

yet spring rises like a phoenix

from the ashes of winter

all that is lost was never real

is the heart big enough

for the source of weeping

is the heart big enough

for this pure delight

Arau Open Debate 2009, Perlis, Malaysia

2009-06-02T21:44:00.001-07:00

This was my first time stepping my feet on Malaysia, here Mona, Novi, Hotma and I were still in Polonia International Airport, Medan, we were about to join Arau Debate Open, and we were tense about it, cos we basically had no preparations, and we are novice debaters. :)

U see many people from different universities were joining, mostly were definitely from Malaysia, and the foreign ones were Pakistan, Taiwan, and of course Indonesia.

As for the debates, these were the motions in the preliminary one to six:

Prelim 1

1. This house would allow family members to sell the dead body of their kins

2. This house believes that suicide is a right for all individuals

3. This house would allow those who reached puberty to get married

and...we debated on the third motion with UiTM Melaka 2

Prelim 2

1. This house would impose mandatory lashing as a punishment for snatch theft

2. This house believes that vernacular schools is key to racial integration

3. This house believes that interfaith marriage should be permissible in Malaysia

and, motion number two was the one we had contention with UiTM Tganu 1

Prelim 3

1. This house would teach magic in schools

2. This house would promote transexual beauty pageant

3. This house would not deprive our children from lessons of failure

we debated on motion number two against UMP1

Prelim 4

1. This house would eliminate player agents in football

2. This house believes that host countries should not automatically qualify for the world cup

3. This house believes that female athletes should be allowed to compete against men

we had motion number one against KBM2

Prelim 5

1. This house would make surrogacy a legal profession

2. This house would impose a quota for women in upper management

3. This house believes that the pope should get married

we debated on motion 2, hehe affirmative action thingy against BMI 1

Prelim 6

1. This house believes that the Don't ask Don't tell policy is crucial to national security

2. This house believes that those who committed torture under instructions should escape prosecution

3. This house believes that acquiring information through pain is justified

then, we debated against UiTM Tganu 1 again on the first motion, hehe, and we won two times against them, hehe, but they are surely nice people and tough debaters.

So, we eventually became the top 16 out of 49 teams, and I am the 10th best speaker out of 138 people, based on scores. Very happy...

We also had our trip to Gua Kelam...

My best friends, Novi and Mona, were playing in the water, wasn't it nice? :)

Now, in the closing ceremony, time to say goodbye, hiks...

With Osama, the Pakistani adjudicator

Above, you can see Sabrina, the deputy convener who was such a patient girl, thanks, Sabs, and she was with Monalisa, the president of our debating society.

Then....Try our best to fly to Medan on Saturday, cos Perlis to Penang was around three hours, but we missed our flights, hiks... but it was ok, cos then Hafiedz came as a hero helping us, he offered us to stay in her house in Penang for one night, so, we were saved, at least we didnt have to sleep at the airport... And luckily, we could reschedule our tickets to Sunday, hehehe... the art of persuasion, hohoho ^o^

Hotma was sad....TT

And at night time, we were then brought by Hafiedz to eat at Indian's restaurant...

and this was the drink I love, called "Teh Tarik"... so luscious...

Yummy, yummy.... Will I come back to Malaysia again? Hopefully, you never know...never know...

Inescapable reality

2009-06-02T21:25:00.001-07:00

Love is a dream

that does not stop

when I awaken

but constantly surprises

no strong emotions

stirring up dust

and clouding my vision

Love is more than it seems

and has a purpose

I cannot see

and yet

cannot hide from

Love is an inescapable reality

that knocks ME

senseless

takes my breath away

and leaves no heart beating

but its own

Things to do

2009-06-02T20:49:00.000-07:00

Well, well, well, today 3rd June 2009, Wednesday...

- Going to Gramedia book store and rock the novels

- Doing presentation in front of DIKTI, hopefully my PKMM gets thru PIMNAS

- Teaching in the evening

What a life!

Wish me the best... :)